By Lauren Bergeski
The North Star
L’Anse Creuse HS North
1st Place
Division 1, News Writing
Bylined Opinion Article
Somebody call The Guinness Book of World Records, because I have just set an amazing feat. I was/am the first person in history to ask for a detention. It wasn’t even a substitution for suspen-sion; I just needed a de-tention. My motivation? A deceitful cult classic, a misleading major motion picture, a fraudulent film. That’s right, “The Breakfast Club.”
“The Breakfast Club” is a lie. The movie told us that detention would be an adventure, running around the hallways, dancing on top of book-shelves, and hiding from ignorant teachers. The reality could not be far-ther from the movie.
My dedication had no boundaries. I was so intent on getting a detention that I went straight to the top: the Dean, Jennie Brady. This is where I learned my first lesson:
never get lunch detention.
Across from my seat sat a lone teenager, eating lunch in solitude with just the silence to com-fort her.The sight was heartbreaking, but before anything was said, Dean Brady entered the room, and I was given my detention.
When a student gets served, they are given a reflection form. The form asks the basics, like “What did you do wrong?” and “How are you going to fix it?” The school destroys the idea of writing a snarky essay, like in “The Breakfast Club,” before you even walk in.
“Baby Jail” as Keith Corsi, supervisory aide, calls it, is held in room 101. I got quite a few friendly stares from my fellow classmates upon entering the room. Corsi, started on the rules by saying, “No talking, no laughing, no sleeping, no playing, and no fun.” Meanwhile, during Corsi’s speech, the kid next to me tried to
snake a mess of black earbuds up his hoodie. I don’t know if his time in detention had hardened him, or if he has always been this bold. Either way, he got caught. As if I didn’t see that coming. Luckily, he got off easy, and was allowed to listen to his music as long as he cooperated.
One thing the movies get wrong is the teachers. There seems to be an unwritten rule of mutual respect. Corsi backed this statement up, saying “Nothing bad has really happens in detention. Nothing big.”
For example, a senior, who was there for skipping class, had multiple hours of detention to serve. He was unable to stay after for two straight hours, so Corsi called Dean Brady who arrived 10 minutes later and let him split up his detention time.
That was it. Trust me, I am just as disappointed as you are. There were no thrilling chases through the halls, nor any bonding with my fellow vagabonds. Detention was not like “The Breakfast Club.” Detention was a small room, where the regretful whispers of your classmates are your only friend.
Sincerely yours, The After School Snack Club